Let me just say that I had grand ideas about writing this post tomorrow morning, leisurely sitting at my kitchen table, sun streaming through the windows, tea in hand. Since my surgery wasn’t scheduled till 1:30, I’d have time once the kids were off to school to finish packing, enjoy my clear liquids and thoughtfully write my blog post.

And then the surgeon’s assistant called at dinner time tonight to inform me that my surgery had been pushed up to 9:30 tomorrow morning. Yup. That’s a 6:45 report-for-duty time.

So I am instead running around like a total nut job, trying to finish everything on my rather ambitious to-do list. And really, at this late hour what’s it’s turning into is an exercise in moving most of the items on that list to a new one titled “After.” After? When is after? I don’t know, but at this point I’ve managed to rationalize why quite a lot of items belong on that list instead.

So anyway, the hip surgery…With Christmas and the Disney trip and other stuff, I just haven’t had any time to get worked up about it. Probably a good thing, really. Having done this before, I’m more relaxed in some ways. For instance, I don’t think I’m going to be as nervous about the surgery itself. With the last hip dealio, plus the 2 eye surgeries, I’m starting to get used to the drill. And, my friend Diane works at the hospital and is coordinating my anesthesia team, so it’s cool knowing ahead that I’ll have awesome folks in the OR with me – my anesthesia posse, if you will: Gary, Jen, Lora and Karen – my new BFF’s. Speaking of anesthesia, it only took me calling the Mayo Clinic every other week for two months to get a copy of my anesthesia records from my surgeries there. I am totally serious. But it was worth it, because Mayo seems to have solved the nausea after anesthesia riddle. They call it “The Triple” and I swear, it’s magic. No post-surgery barfing is a glorious, wonderful thing. But oh boy, you’d think I’d asked for the Colonel’s secret blend of eleven herbs and spices or something. It’s all good now though, because I have the recipe and I passed it along to Diane, who will hand it off to my new best friend, Gary the anesthesiologist. Good to go.

Of course, knowing what to expect also has its drawbacks. I remember very clearly how not fun the first week after surgery was. The level of helplessness is off the charts, and totally stressful for those of us who are very accustomed to self-sufficiency. I’m also not looking forward to the dreaded “no bending more than 90 degrees” rule. It lasts for 6 weeks and is basically movement jail. But I have my assistive devices all laid out and ready, and I’m going to just take a deep breath and keep reminding myself that it’s 6 weeks, not 6 months. Suck it up, cookie.

The surgery could be really quick and smooth, or it could be more complicated, depending on what they find when they get in there. If I get to keep my cup (the hip socket liner that’s already in there), and there’s no metal debris or funky stuff to clean up, this could be a way easier surgery than my first one. A lot of the pain and swelling and stuff from the first surgery came from the fact that they had to dislocate my hip – and apparently had a very difficult time doing so – and they won’t be doing that this time, since I’m getting a traditional hip replacement (read: they’ll cut off the top of my femur. Yuck, I know, but no dislocation necessary).

I’ll try to get a quick blog post up tomorrow if I can, just to (hopefully) share the good news that my surgery was successful, devoid of surprises and thoroughly boring and unremarkable.

I’ve had a few people ask about visitors. Yes, I would love visitors. I absolutely adore having people come see me in the hospital. That said, last time I fell asleep on every last person who visited. No exceptions. So, if I end up on the same cocktail of painkillers that I was on last time, you can count on me falling asleep mid-sentence if you visit. Just promise me that if it’s funny and you put it on YouTube, I get a cut when you get rich and famous. I’ll be at Abbott Northwestern Hospital if you want to give it a try. Just text me or Rich first so we can tell you if it’s a good time (oh who am I kidding – text Rich and he’ll wake me up and ask me, that’s what’s really going to happen). I’ll also be thrilled to have visitors once I’m home, so remember that if you’re bored next week.

I still have a few things left to do that I was unable to rationalize putting off – things like packing. You know you’re having old person surgery when the packing list the hospital sends you includes things like denture cleaner. Seriously. It’s funny watching nurses’ faces when they come in my room, totally not expecting to see a 44 year old. So I guess that’s a silver lining of sorts – I feel decidedly youthful. Well, until they have me using a walker. Then, not so much.

Thanks so much for all the well wishes and prayers! It’s been uplifting reading all the texts and Facebook messages. Prayers appreciated for tomorrow – for Dr. Anseth, my anesthesia team and especially my family; and for an easy, boring surgery with no drama or extra excitement.

And now to the rest of that to-do list…